Thoughts on Therapy or Therapeutic Thoughts--Pt. 2

I went to therapy again. I walked into the session this time with an agenda. During the first session, there was only so much that could be done or said about my psychological issues and what-not since we were limited to an hour. In retrospect, I probably could have increased my words per minute average and maybe gotten a little further. Time is of the essence, folks, especially in instances of restoring sanity.

So my mouth started moving the moment my butt plopped on the couch. One part of my personality that I find to be the most annoying/troubling (SPOILER ALERT) is my obsessive nature. I won't dive into it much here, because quite frankly, it's hard to explain. But I told dear Eva my woes and troubles with this tendency I have. We discussed why I am this way, which after years of psychoanalyzing myself I've basically already figured out, but when we proceeded to talk about how to change it, we were faced with two options:
1. Divert the fixation onto something healthy -- Eva's example: therapy for the rest of forever, or
2. KILL IT--the obsessive nature, that is, not the objects of obsession.

With regards to option number one, I know (stress here--know) that the correct biblical response would be to divert my fixation to God. Probably not in some creepy Mandy Moore in Saved! sort of way but in the I-know-God-can-sustain-me sort of way. I have a hard time talking about my struggles in this area, because I think I tend to rub up against the danger zone when it comes to my questions of faith. There are times a question will form in my mind, and it turns everything I believe upside-down in an instant. Fickle, I know. Foolish, yes probably. Dangerous, perhaps. Neurotic, most definitely. But to ignore those questions would only lead to an existential crisis later on. I know this because it has happened before. However, I do believe and can't help but believe in Truth. I believe it exists, and I believe it's God. Cryptic and open-ended as that may seem sometimes, it is my comfort. I would like to experience consistency of faith in salvation and constant appeals to God, and I do suppose that is what I should be striving for all the time. But sometimes it's not. That's all I can really say about it. It's just not.

As for option number two, I'm not really sure how to kill it. The obsession is like a hunger, but I've also discovered it is largely bred from fear. Fear of purposelessness, unimportance, unfounded routines, etc. Having a healthy fear of God would probably be helpful with this option, too. In general, I don't see how God is not the answer, but I also struggle at times to see how God is the answer. All I know is that God is the only thing that ever really makes sense, and there is a reason for that.